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Jury Duty

If you have a trial scheduled tomorrow, I just might be 1/12th of your Judgment Day.

Don't quake in your boots too much, though. I always make sure to hate the sin and love the sinner.


How did this wind up going?

It was kind of sad. I was on one short trial, which mainly consisted of the jurors sitting around eating donuts, drinking coffee and wondering where the judge was.

We had to pass judgment on a woman who came home one morning, found her husband with another woman, and took the woman's car. "You enjoyed my spouse, therefore I'll enjoy your transportation" was kind of the theme. Unfortunately it's a lot easier to get justice for a carjack than a hubbyjack.

TV lawyers are fictional and are therefore a lot smarter than the genuine article. The lawyers on this case left out all kinds of things that would have been pertinent, like "Once the police found the car, how did the car-owning hussy get her keys back?" They included other things that weren't pertinent -- in a legal sense, anyway -- such as "The car was a replacement for another car that the owner had totaled" and "The wife was upset when she took the car." Unfortunately, the law doesn't read "A stolen vehicle should be considered stolen unless the party who stole it was in a state of emotional distress, in which case the vehicle should be considered to have been borrowed by someone who needed the comfort a reliable, well-maintained vehicle can bring."

Oh, and I got money out of performing this public service. Thirty pieces of silver! For some reason the bank won't cash it, though.

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