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Friday, March 26, 2004

Elevator speaks the word

The elevator in the office building where I work displays this little newscrawlie thing that get quirky little stories from CNN or something. It informed me that a man who murdered his pregnant lover was inspired by "The Passion of Christ" to come forward and confess his crime. Christian fundamentalists will no doubt hail this as a miracle of justice and redemption and such. And it brings to mind something I've realized about Christian fundamentalists that modern, secular people just don't get. See, everyone thinks they're moralistic and judgmental, but the thing is they're *not*. Not at all. And that's one of the reasons they're so scary. *I'm* moralistic and judgmental. Most people with a shred of human decency are. E.G: I think anybody who murders his pregnant lover is pretty much a dick. I don't care what he says about Jesus dying for him, he's a dick. Jesus dying doesn't make him not a dick. I've done some dickish things in my life, but I'm better than that guy. Way better. But the fundies don't see it that way, they think I'm just as much of a dick as he is, they think we're *all* dicks because of our sinful natures. We're all equally awful, no one is truly good, and only this God person gets to judge, (although they generally seem to have a pretty good handle on His positions) All that matters is if you're sorry, and you tell Jesus this, because He's the person whose forgiveness you need to ask for, not say, your dead girlfriend, because she was a sinner too. Harlot.

Now I masturbate a fair amount (which most sane people don't consider sinful anyway, but let's say it's a trivial sin for the sake of argument) I'm not sorry about it. Not one bit. Therefore it's eternal damnation for me. But the murderer guy, who as established, murdered someone, is in a state of grace because he told Jesus he's sorry.

This is warped, but it's not judgmental or moralistic. I remember one Jack Chick pamphlet that's about two cowboys. All Jack Chick pamphlets are about something like cowboys, which is what makes them great. One cowboy is a lawman, honest, righteous and compassionate. But he's an atheist. The other cowboy is a mass murdering criminal but he tells Jesus he's sorry at the end. You can guess where they each wind up for eternity.

And these people are like a third of the American population and they control our government. Always a happy thought to contemplate.

See I'm judgmental, I think there are cool people, and there are dicks. Not saying there are no shades of grey, there are lots, but that's basically how it is. I think Jesus was judgmental too. I guess the fundies think he was the one person who had a right to be. I think everybody does. The ability to judge is what makes you *human* for fuck's sake. Jesus was always telling the hypocrites where to get off, because he had a sense of what was right. He was a cool person, Mel Gibson is a dick.

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