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Saturday, December 2, 2006

Even more clever than "proctologist"

I heard the wittiest improv comedy suggestion ever the other night: CONDOMS!

It's been thirty six hours and the old funnybone has yet to recover.

Shortly thereafter I met an Irishman (like from Ireland) named Alan Woods. His Irish name is not nearly as Irish as my own.

It snowed a great deal yesterday, and it bewildered me once again, as it does every year, that people in Chicago react as if this is somehow an unprecedented calamity and they have no freaking idea how to deal with it. It's as if the entire city is populated by Floridian tourists who have never been here before. Public transportation apparently shut down. I managed to hit a good window and get into work on time (well, "on time" by my usual standards) Then discovered my office was closed! Like school. Chump I am, I spent a couple of hours there anyway, got some things done, then headed home. Then, since I'd been up pretty late the previous night, I proceeded to sleep away the rest of this bountiful day off.

God, I disgust myself sometimes.

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